Category Archives: Okay

Film Review: The Skeleton Key (2005) HorrorAthon 3

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Directed by: Ian Softley

Starring: Kate Hudson, Peter Sarsgaard and Joy Bryant

Reviewed by: Brendan Graham (Phantomhour)

Voodoo, Hoodoo, Black Magic, Plantations that creep the living hell out of people…also delicious food, New Orleans has a reputation for the macabre, and this flick also uses said reputation to build scares. Does the film still hold up 10 years later?

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Film Review: Resident Evil (2002) HorrorAthon 3

resident-evil-1.28012Directed by: Paul W.S. Anderson

Starring: Milla Johovich, Michelle Rodriguez and James Purefoy

Reviewed by: Brendan Graham (Phantomhour)

If you’re a gamer, you know about Resident Evil or Biohazard if you prefer the Japanese title. One of the many games to give birth to the survival horror genre, Resident Evil had it all. Scares, intense action and a story that was so involving, players felt as though they had stumbled into a real nightmare. Sony Pictures brought audiences into that world in 2002, but managed to screw up the story along the way.

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Film Review: The Haunting (1999) HorrorAthon 3

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Directed by: Jan de Bont

Starring: Liam Neeson, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Owen Wilson and Lili Taylor

Reviewed by: Brendan Graham (Phantomhour)

“There once was a house, a bright happy home, something bad happened, now it sits all alone.” In 1999, Dreamworks brought audiences back to Hill House for another spooky romp. Based on the classic film “The Haunting” from 1963 and the book The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson, what many believe to be one of the spookiest haunted house stories ever told, This remake wanted to bring the chills to life for a whole new generation of audiences. Did it succeed? How well does the film stand up 16 Years later?

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TV Review: Scream Queens (2015) HorrorAthon 3

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Created by: Ryan Murphy (Glee, American Horror Story)

Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Emma Roberts, Skyler Samuels and Lea Michelle

Reviewed by: Brendan Graham (Phantomhour)

I’ll just come out and say it. I hated Glee. American Horror Story is also hit and miss with the finales being gigantic buckets of suck. So, I was very nervous about this latest work by Ryan Murphy about a sorority house that is plagued by a murderer after an incident that happened at the house 20 years ago. This time around he was aiming for a comedy, so hopefully that means it’s funny right? I watched the first couple episodes, and while this review doesn’t represent the whole show, it gives you a taste.

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Game Review: Godzilla: The Game (PS4)

Godzilla is a difficult game to talk about objectively, and pretty difficult to review. I’ve been a fan of Godzilla since I was a kid. I first saw the Hanna Barbara Godzilla Power Hour cartoon, but my interest really took off after seeing the 1998 movie (which admittedly is still a guilty pleasure movie for me). I’ve seen all the movies, watched the cartoons, and heck, I still even have a Godzilla ’98 lunchbox that I got in the first grade. Although my interest in giant monsters waned a bit as I got older, the 2014 film reignited my passion for the big G and his foes, and I now own every film on DVD/Blu-Ray.

So why am I telling you about this? Because how passionate about Godzilla you are really determines how much enjoyment you will get out of this game. This is not Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters, a game even non-Godzilla fans can just pick up and enjoy. I will tell you right now, if you aren’t huge into Godzilla, if you’re not the type who appreciates the awful b-movie dialogue, or the way the character models actually move and look like rubber suits stomping around in miniature cities, this is not the game for you.

Gameplay:

Godzilla’s main mode, “God of Destruction Mode” is an arcade style game, where your goal is to destroy as many buildings as possible, as well as G-Energy generators, in order to absorb their G-energy and grow Godzilla (or any of the other kaiju you’ve unlocked) to the largest size you can. The more buildings you destroy within a certain time raises your multiplier, earning you more G-Energy and growth for every building destroyed. The campaign has a mission structure similar to Star Fox, with multiple branching paths varying in difficulty. The more difficult paths have generators that must be destroyed within a certain time limit, and often throw more, and larger, monsters at you. This mode takes about one hour to beat on one playthrough, but will take longer if you want to replay to play every level and find all four “research points” in each stage. Doing so will unlock the last few stages, but only if your Kaiju has reached over 100 meters in size. If you choose a “Defender” monster such as Mothra or Kiryu, your objective will actually revolve around defending generators and buildings from kaiju. You must defeat the monster before it destroys the generators. The less it destroys, the higher your score and power will rise.

godzilla2Another mode is the “King of the Monsters” mode, which is simply stage after stage of fighting CPU-controlled monsters. You select a monster to play as, and the monsters you face in battle will progressively be larger and stronger.

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Unlockables:

Godzilla features a good amount of unlockables, most of which are new kaiju to play as, as well as abilities and moves for them. Defeating certain monsters in battle will yield parts or cells that can be used to upgrade certain abilities for certain monsters in Evolution Mode, such as charge time for your energy attacks, or even new attack combos. Different upgrades require different monster parts, which are obtained by playing “God of Destruction” or “King of the Monsters”.

Other unlockables include figures and settings for Diorama Mode. The stages are unlocked by destroying 100% of a stage in “God of Destruction” mode, and figures of monsters in various poses are unlocked by spending parts in Evolution Mode. You can place your figures in these dioramas and take photos of them.

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Online Play:

The only form of multiplayer is online play, where three kaiju face off in a free-for-all monster battle. Unfortunately, because the game wasn’t exactly designed to be a fighting game, the combat feels shallow and your success pretty much depends on how much you’ve upgraded your character in Evolution Mode.

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Fanservice:

This is where this game really shines. You can clearly tell the developers are very passionate about the franchise and keeping everything as accurate as possible. The characters move and control like men in rubber suits. You can even see the seams on King Ghidorah’s neck! MechaGodzilla has his spinning head shield! Godzilla 1964 has the silly looking googly eyes! The short intro cutscenes where the monsters appear are taken directly from their first appearances in their respective films! THE GODZILLA DANCE FROM INVASION OF THE ASTRO MONSTER IS AN UNLOCKABLE ATTACK! Every monster has movie-accurate attacks, beam effects, and roars. Many of the game’s music tracks are taken from movies as well. The environments even look like miniature buildings, and spark as they are destroyed in the same fashion as they do in the films. The dialogue even has the same cheesy style of delivery as many of the dub actors from the films do. Everything in this game was designed to appeal to the hardcore Godzilla fan and as a pretty huge fan myself, I ate it right up.

godzilla6Rating:

As a Godzilla fan, I really enjoyed what this game had to offer, but objectively, there’s no denying that Godzilla: The Game is a small-budget title for a niche audience. While the game is immensely faithful to the source material, the visuals aren’t outstanding, the gameplay is repetitive, and the online mode gets old very quickly. However, the sheer amount of fanservice and the ability to stomp around cities and beating other kaiju as your favorite Godzilla monster make this a fun Godzilla simulator. The game is pretty short, but with a decent amount of unlockables and upgrades to keep you busy playing, at least for a little while longer. I definitely do not recommend this title for anyone looking for a deep experience, nor do I recommend buying it at a full sixty dollars. But if you love Godzilla, I say give it a rent, or even buy it if you can find it for a cheap price.

Godzilla: The Game for PS4 gets an okay out of ten.

Film Review: Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

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Starring: Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan

Directed by: Sam Taylor-Johnson

Reviewed by: Phantomhour (Brendan Graham)

This will be an interesting experience, I told myself going into Fifty Shades of Grey. I read the book, if you’re married, you had to. What did I think of the book that started as a Twilight fan fiction? I thought it was probably one of the worst reads I’ve had in a long time. Terrible characters, terrible plot devices, and ridiculously written scenes of sensuality that felt like a 14 year old wrote them. With the movie, I had hoped they had tried to make more sense of this childish dribble. They did seem to work Hollywood magic into this stinker of a book and formed something at least more bearable out of it.

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Horrorathon Film Review: ABCs of Death 2 (2014)

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Starring: Many actors

Directed by: Many directors

Reviewed by: Freekz80

 

So… I suppose I should explain myself. This might come as a surprise to many of you considering I rated the original ABCs of Death a 1/10. It deserved it. Oh god, it deserved it. But I decided to give the series another chance, and if there was ever a case of a sequel actually being superior to the original, besides Halo 2, this is it. These shorts actually weren’t bad. As I did with my review of the original, I’ll take a few shorts that stood out to me and review them individually.

A is  for Amateur (E.L. Katz)

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Being the first short in the lineup, it’s pretty important that this one deliver as it gives the first impression! No fear, Katz does a great job with this short. A hitman encounters some… issues while attempting a hit. It’s definitely unique in the way it plays out,  and it’s unexpected! Always a plus. ABCs of Death 2 is off to a good start!

B is for Badger (Julian Barratt)

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You know it’s good when you weren’t quite ready for the short to end. This one features a film crew looking to document some local wildlife, and they stumble upon something quite startling. Gory, incredibly gory, but that’s just the way we like it. Wow, ABCs 2 might actually be a good film!

D is for Deloused (Robert Morgan)

Pretty disturbing, if not absolutely disgusting. Essentially, a man is executed and exacts vengeance upon his killers with the help of a strange bug. I wasn’t a huge fan of the claymation here (also largely disliked it in the original film) and to be quite honest, couldn’t wait for this particular short to end. This one was a turn off.

M is for Masticate (Robert Boocheck) 

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In this short, a man is shown running down a street, tackling a victim, then attempting to eat them. That’s it.  It kept me watching without too much gore, and nothing absolutely disgusting or disturbing, which is fantastic. The use of slow motion was pretty effective as well. I definitely enjoyed it.

S is for Split (Juan Martinez Moreno)

This is another example of the finer shorts in ABCs of Death 2. A man staying in France calls his wife, only for her to be attacked in their home while on the phone. The cinematography is very well done, it’s disturbing, suspenseful, and violent. It’s great that all of that can be accomplished with nothing being blatantly overdone. It’s also got an interesting twist!

X is for Xylophone (Juilen Maury, Alexandre Bustillo)

I really have no idea what the point of this short was. This one was almost as bland and uneventful as “G is for Gravity” from the first ABCs of Death. Needless to say, I didn’t like it at all.  I guess you don’t have a whole lot to work with when you are stuck with a shitty letter of the alphabet, haha!

Y is for Youth (Soichi Umezawa)

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Alright, what the fuck? Why are the Japanese shorts always so strange and disturbing? Why don’t they ever make any sense? Is there something I need to know about? This particular short reminded me of “Z is for Zetsumetsu” from the original film, and let me clarify, that is NOT a good thing. I mean, I guess they had some… ahem… uhm, “interesting” props and special effects? That’s really about it. The execution was poor, the story is not coherent, and is essentially nonexistent.

Final Score: 

While this film definitely is an improvement over the first, it still has some flaws. I suppose that is unavoidable with 26 different directors, but I am still reviewing the film as a whole. Would I recommend you watch it? Yes, but only once. There are some great shorts, and there are some downright awful shorts. In comparison to the first film, which had literally zero decent shorts, this is a step in the right direction. But alas, a polished turd is still a turd.

…Just kidding. ABCs of Death 2 was a decent experience! 6/10.

Okay

Gore: 10/10. Some of these shorts are fucking disgusting.

Scares: 2/10. Not many, but some of the shorts are quite disturbing.

Beware: Tons of blood and other nasty body fluids, giant badgers, giant japanese dicks, and, uh… a slew of other shit that makes no sense.